Raison D'etre

As there hasn't been a movie
In a decade that can move me,
I'd rather have an enema
Than attend my local cinema.
In or out of their mascara,
Jean Arthur and Maureen O'Hara
Oscars easily would winneth
Before Geena, Cher, or Gwyneth
With their collagen injections
Could stir my limp affections.
But... play ingenue or harlot,
You... will always be my starlet.
Julia or Winona's work,
Or Madonna's, makes me york,
But I'd sit and watch all three
If you were my Ju-Ju-bee.
And I'd gladly hold your hand
At life's great concession stand
If you'd be my Hot Tamale,
Nut-Roll, Pay-Day...or, by golly...
My Slow-Poke, Star Burst, and Twix!
Then those other movie chicks,
With their tucks and nips and knickers,
Can "TUCK OFF," my little Snickers.
For on life's great movie set,
You're my reel Raisinette.